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Recent research into the field of dinosaur jerkology has shed light on this predisposition for spikes among certain dinosaurs.

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There are various scenarios I can think of off the top of my head which would bring the dinosaur threat to American soil. Such as the discovery of a subterranean lost continent of dinosaurs as described by Obruchev in the cautionary Russian novel Plutonia. Or the accidental super-feralization of rogue GMO chicken species upon their escape into the Kansas wilds, a scenario the National Chicken Council refuses to comment on when I accuse them on twitter.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. Logo Mug Shop Home. Recent Features Dead D! You can see how this would be an equally troubling scenario at your hipster bar on Vegan Taco Tuesdays. Dinosaurs seem to think that having spikes gives them license to be a douche. Edmontonia took the basic concept of being a giant spiky armored bully like Sauropelta and then started doing steroids and cocaine.

As a little kid, did you ever have that jerk friend who would try out all of his karate moves on you? This is basically how Edmontonia functioned in real life.

And boy, did Edmontonia have spikes. There is not an angle one could approach Edmontonia without walking into spikes. Dinosaurs are not something to joke about.

The rest of us do fine having normal, unspiked hides and we all have bellies. This is an average conversation between Styracosaurus and Edmontonia. Ceratopsians were spiky bastards, but most of them kept things more or less under control. Three horns, maybe five, tops. I can almost buy that as a self defense thing. There were theropods in the Cretaceous, I get that. But then you get a freaking nut job like Styracosaurus into the conversation.

Styracosaurus had at least nine spikes on its face. Oh, except for the broadsword sized one on its nose. Imagine if the only way you could walk toward something was by pointing nine bowie knives at it. No wonder Styracosaurus was such a jerk. Scientists theorize that the giant spiked frill of Styracosaurus might have helped it shed heat, which makes a lot of sense. And probably also tax paying Aussies and Bulgarians. Anyway, stay tuned next week for a major site update hint: Why is T-Rex considered such a tough guy when we know these guys were around?

Instead of spikes he had… tiny arms?

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